Modiyfing child support

I've heard the story many times- after divorce Father and Mother reach an agreement that (typically Father) can reduce his child support payments due to reduced income, other financial stressors, etc. Father goes along with paying his support obligation as they've agreed to modify it, and a couple of years later, Mother takes Father to court for his unpaid child support- calculating the unpaid support using the amount dictated by the divorce decree. The results is thousands of dollars of "unpaid" support and interest. I've represented both Fathers and Mothers in this scenario. The truth is, in Missouri, you cannot modify a child support decree without an order from the court.

While I believe it is usually the best intentions that lead parents to agree informally to reduce child support payments, in the end I find that there are hurt feelings and anger after one parent takes the other to court, either denying that the informal agreement took place, or having the court find that such an agreement was not legally binding. It is always in the best interests of the children to have their parents be on as good terms as possible; in some cases that means being friends, in some cases that means friendly, in others cordial and in some it means not being actively angry in front of the children. Going back to court seeking back child support almost never engenders good feelings between the parties.

To avoid this scenario, and to ensure that the party receiving support is being treated fairly and that the party paying support is not setting himself up for allegations of delinquent support, it is best to seek advice from attorneys and formalize the modification through the Court. Better communication and understanding now will lead to fewer arguments and hurt feelings later, and that is surely in the best interest of all parties involved.

Take care, Allison

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